Thursday, February 15, 2007

Another one down.

Just finished the oral exam of my fourth rotation. I can hardly believe it. I am two rotations away from finishing my third year. Where does time go to?

Sha, it's not been easy. I failed my first rotation exams - the oral and the written. I am still in shock myself but I have finally come to accept it. Also, to recognize that failing it does not mean that I am a failure. But, I must admit when I heard that news in October, I went into depression. Well, a mini-depression (ironically, I was doing my psych rotation at that time lol). I stopped working out and everything. I got even more anxious than I am already, and I am an anxious person.

But with time, I now understand what I did wrong.
#1. I missed the memo that the exam was past board questions. I did not find this out until a week before the exam.
#2. I spent my time studying from the wrong book.
#3. I left my notebook with all my notes in Boston! How stupid huh! I didn't find it until after the exam. In fact, I think this was a big factor in my not passing the written.

As far as the oral, I lacked so much confidence. I didn't ask enough questions from the standardized patients and plus I really dislike them. But now that I have had 3 other rotations under my belt, I am more at home with them. The only flaw I have now is to stop laughing at them when they are telling me their concerns. I did that by accident at a mock interview. It was just funny!

I feel more confident in my interviewing and physical exam skills. Now, I need to work on my assessment and planning skills. It's funny, I immediately know what the problem is. I just have this instinct for it, however, I still do not have all the relevant tests in my head. I still find myself consulting a book for that. I know, it takes practice practice practice.

Other than school, I thought this year was going to be an exciting year sha. It started off in an exciting manner. I met this young man online (do not laugh!) and man, he had me going. He was calling me every morning and texting me every afternoon and evening. Come to find out homeboy is married. Wow. I didn't expect that. Maybe a girlfriend or something but a whole wife! Anyway, it was a painful surprise cos he really had me going although the more sensible and always thinking part of me always felt that there was something not quite right about him. I haven't told him that I know that he is a fraudulent time waster. Fortunately, although at the time, i thought it was rather unfortunate and i even wrote the little free verse below, he had stopped talking to me before the discovery. I had told him that I was kind of glad that I had given him a chance because some of the things he had said to me during our second or third phone conversation had me really suspecting him - in short, he was discussing his anatomy with me.

I know, i know, i should have hung up the phone right there and then but I was still trying to figure out if i should be offended or what! After all, I see naked people every day and go all up in them too. LOL. I am trying to get comfortable with that whole thing. The first and last time I did a prostate exam I was so traumatized I wanted to drop out of school right there and then. Shudder. I start Ob-gyn on Tuesday which means six weeks of palpating cervixes and feeling uteruses and ovaries. I am sooooo not looking forward to that.

So I digressed. Anyway sha, after that conversation, homeboy stopped talking to me and I was quite perplexed. I tried to apply that stupid book (hate that book) he's just not into you rules but my curiousity got the better of me so i sent him an e-mail on Saturday. He replied me via text later that day but I didn't get to read it until this morning. (phone was broken) and by that time my sister's bf had already told me that dude was married.

Man! I so want to cuss him out! I so want to tell him that his secret is out but my sister has told me to be quiet and not even engage in any back and forth. Ahhhh, she is taking away my drama!

Need to go find my friends so we can eat lunch and go for the second half of this exam jo.

in a minute.


Cherub (former Bijouxoxo) said...

U updated after so long. Anyway, thank God u're back and that loser (what else is he? He has a wife and he's busy texting u.) is outta ur life. Thank God u realized ur mistakes and will improve on 'em. So what did u do for Vals day? Studying? U're almost done with med school, huh? OBGYN rotation, hope u have fun in ur lil' way with it. All the best, dear and remain blessed under the Almighty's care.

Cherub (former Bijouxoxo) said...

Please, blog about ur OBGYN experiences, whenever u get the chance to, I'd love to read.