been a long time...

i am trusting God with everything that i've got
i'm trusting God with all my dreams, my hopes, my joy
i'm trusting God with all my fears, my hates, my insecurities
the pain at the pit of my stomach
the tears rolling down my cheeks
all of my failures, all of my doubts
i'm trusting God through this night
that has lasted six long years
with only a moment or two of sunshine
to help me endure the months and months of dark
O Lord

I'm trusting You through my doubts
I wonder if You hear, I wonder if You care
I wonder what Your plans are
I wonder if they include my joy
Sometimes I whisper a lie - You must hate me
Then try to cover it up with the truth - Romans eight
But I return to that lie again and again
When You won't let me get my way
Why won't You let me get my way Lord
What is wrong with my way?
What do You see that i don't?
And why won't You share it with me?
So I could be at ease, at peace
But I guess that's why it's called trust

The alternative would be to walk away
Not that I don't do that already
But I love You Lord and i can't keep away
Even though You drive me mad w/
The piecemeal way You reveal my story
I know it will be all good in the end
with years of light to make up for the years of dark
with days of laughter to make up for the nights of tears
But Lord God, my beloved Dad
Must I go through the pain to get to the sweet stuff
I promise I've learned all my lessons
I promise, I promise, I promise
Please just take away the pain!

february 8 2k7 @PVHS