Skip to main content

Message Got.

I wrote this piece almost 12 years ago now after a bad breakup. I thought it was the worst breakup of my life, little did I know what was coming down the line... ahh youth.


can you imagine/i can't
i can't even begin to put it together
or comprehend how i managed to walk around
with eyes closed.
my clothes were not on me
and the people were laughing
but i could not see and was unable to hear
they were pointing at me
but i dismissed their words as mere manifestations
of envy because what we had was true
was amazing, was the best s..t i ever had
i was only right about one thing.



can you imagine/ i can't
i can't even begin to understand this
even though i am turning it inside out and outside in
it is still so unclear to me
the more i stare through this glass
the dimmer it all becomes
the earth i took for granted
is crumbling beneath my feet
i am afraid to face the world
with this distorted perception
when i look at you, did i truly see you
or was it just an image i created overlaid
over you or was it just me seeing half and not the whole
how many other friends are hiding their true intentions
behind my good sight?

i long to call upon my grandfather's god
ogun the hunter's guide
to have you surrounded, put you in his sight line
21 guns all aimed at you or maybe
you locked down chained down tight
somewhere anywhere

i quick pray to the goodness within me
2 wash these thoughts away
because i will not let you change what i am
it's evident you were in my life for a season
i just can't remember what prayer you were in answer to
so i could not let go until
i was disrespected and thrown out the exit
i get the message now
i get the message now











Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

working and the medical student.

Somehow I've become a writer who can't seem to bring herself to write. Okay, so to answer a question posed by bijouxoxo ten thousand years ago. Is possible to work and attend medical school? My biased answer is hell no. Do it at your peril. Medical school is all consuming. It's a jealous beast that wants the student's mind, heart, time, life. That's my word. There's just so much to learn and so little time in the day. Medical schools are trying to improve quality of life by shortening class hours but nevertheless we still spend at least 6 hours per day in class. Enough analysis, let me break it down but keep in mind that every school is different. First Year, first semester: My courses were Anatomy (time consumer), Biochemistry, Genetics, Nutrition, Physicians Patients & Society (PPS, discussing how to be a doc, ethics, customs, etc, luckily only once a week but two hours long, in the afternoon), Longitudinal Preceptor Program(LPP; follow a doctor for 2 yea...
2 comments
Read more

I get so emotional baby every time I think of you...

I was first introduced to her amazing voice by my mother who brought her tape home one day. I played that album out, in fact, hers was the last voice I heard before I went to sleep every night.  Whitney, I loved her and eventually I came to know almost every song she had song to date (circa 1992-93, still don't know how because this was before Google, YouTube, ITunes, shoot the internet wasn't even widely accessible yet).   I remember being so excited for her when she was on Video Soul with Donnie Simpson talking about her soon to be born daughter and the name that she and her husband had finally agreed on: Bobbi Kristina.  I remember watching her perform on one award show or the other and shutting it down! I was in awe of her talent. She could SING! You couldn't talk bad about Whitney to me back then. A friend of mine dared to say Sade was prettier than Whitney, I'm still a bit mad at her for that. And when the Bodyguard soundtrack was released, I...
2 comments
Read more

Bright lights in the big city...

I finally went to Las Vegas. It wasn't a pleasure trip. I was sent by my boss to learn how to code better and make money so really most of my time was spent in a teaching class and i am very proud to say that I didn't fall asleep once. I did get a chance to go for a spot of sightseeing after the class. I really dragged my feet but eventually at around 6pm, I was ready to leave the hotel. The hotel where I stayed was close to the monorail and bus so getting to the strip was super easy. I bought a 24 hour pass and I was good. My initial plan was to go to Bellagio and see the water show, the conservatory and then from there go to the outlet shops to see what i could see. However, and these people who built the monorail are very very brillant people, in fact, they need to get a genius grant for being good at separating tourists and their money because I was completely derailed once I got off the train at the stop for Bally's. As you, my one beloved reader, may or may not know...
1 comment
Read more